Adulting 101: What You Need to Know About Leaving the Nest

Key Takeaways

  • The pressure to have it all figured out right away as an adult can be extremely overwhelming, but the good news is—there’s no one right way to do it all.
  • If you’re wondering how to successfully “adult”, we’ve put together a list of healthy habits to help you manage the four essentials for building a successful future: finances, personal goals, relationship goals, and work-life balance.
  • Life is full of ups and downs, so when a challenging situation comes your way—we’ve got some tricks that can help you overcome it. Remember to pause and breathe, organize your thoughts with a pros and cons list, and reconnect with your long-term goals.

Ah, adulting: the time when you leave the nest, spread your wings, and realize… you might not actually know how to fly. The term “adulting” has become a popular way to describe behavior that is seen as responsible and grown-up. According to dictionary.com, the definition of this behavior often “involves meeting the mundane demands of independent and professional living” (you know, paying the bills and running errands).

Leaving the nest is both exciting and overwhelming. After all, no one has adulting figured out perfectly—and that’s the beauty of it. You’ll go through ups and downs, but you’ll inevitably grow throughout the process. At the end of the day, it’s your story to write; but at College Raptor, we’re always here to help. We’ve put together your “Adulting 101” guide with some tips and tricks for transitioning into adulthood.

What Does “Adulting” Even Mean?

Legally, you become an adult at 18. But that doesn’t mean you magically know everything right then and there. The transition into adulthood is so fast that suddenly, you seem to be the one doing all of the things and don’t know how or when that happened. There are so many tasks to be solved: deciding what to make for dinner, figuring out how to open a bank account, unclogging a toilet, trying to spend money wisely, making big life decisions, and even just choosing whether to do laundry on Tuesday or Friday.

While exciting, it can also feel like a whirlwind trying to figure everything out. Many people experience imposter syndrome—a defeating feeling of being a fraud and doubting their skills—throughout their transition to adulthood. Just take a deep breath, because there’s no right way to do it all. A lot of adulthood is just figuring it out as you go.

Societal Expectations and the Pressure to “Adult”

Adulthood means a newfound independence where you get to call the shots. But it can also come with a feeling of immense pressure from society. All of a sudden, you’re expected to master these life skills like getting a stable job, paying bills, moving out on your own, cooking healthy meals, understanding taxes, or even starting a family.

Feeling like you have to have it all figured out right away can be extremely overwhelming. While you might think you’re behind or feel inadequate when looking at a curated social media profile, don’t let yourself fall into the comparison trap. Focus on your own path—there’s no perfect timeline for adulting because everyone moves at their own pace, in their own way.

Your Adulting 101 Guide

You might be asking yourself, “How does one successfully ‘adult’?” Our answer: You just need the right tools. The pressure to adult successfully is quite common, but there are ways to manage it so you can experience success—even through the ups and downs. Let’s look at the four essential pillars of success that can help you build a healthy and successful future: finances, personal goals, relationship goals, and work-life balance.

1. Financial Success

It may come as no surprise that a very common source of stress for adults is finances. Whether it’s relying on credit cards or being stuck in student debt, your financial situation can cause severe anxiety and even set you back on reaching your goals. Setting yourself up for financial success from the start can help make a difference in the long run:

  • Learn to budget by tracking your income and expenses to understand your spending habits.
  • Start an emergency fund. Sometimes your car needs repairs or you have an unplanned visit to the doctor’s office. By setting aside money in a savings account, you’ll be able to handle those surprise expenses without derailing your budget.
  • Create a savings goal! It doesn’t matter if you can only save $25 a month to start—you’ll be surprised at how a little goes a long way.
  • Learn how to responsibly leverage credit cards, loans, and investments as ways to manage your money.

2. Personal Success

Your physical, emotional, and mental well-being are all connected. If one is off balance, they all are. Here are some tips to help prioritize taking care of you:

  • Schedule self-care time—whether it’s exercising, cooking, going outdoors, or watching your favorite show. These are the little things that contribute to a healthy well-being.
  • Don’t forget to celebrate your milestones and achievements, no matter how small. Whether you aced a test, got a promotion, or just had a good night’s sleep, it’s important to recognize each step toward success.
  • Learn to identify what causes your stress or other negative emotions and then actively seek ways to address it.
  • Accept that learning is lifelong, whether it’s going back to school, developing a new skill set, or just picking up a hobby. Continuous learning will help build your confidence and could even open doors to new opportunities.

3. Relationship Success

Adulthood can feel lonely, especially if you live alone or just moved to a new city for a job. This is where relationships, whether romantic or platonic, can help. They are what help us feel a sense of belonging, connection, and happiness. Even with all the new responsibilities you now have as an adult, there are ways you can still build meaningful relationships:

  • Invest in healthy relationships that support and uplift you. Plan time for your loved ones, like scheduling a dinner to look forward to or joining your friend for a quick walk during your lunch hour.
  • Practice setting healthy boundaries in your relationships to help you feel safe, respected, and cared for. It’s okay to say “no” to avoid feeling overwhelmed or taken advantage of. Setting boundaries protects your time, energy, and mental health.
  • Improve communication by practicing active listening, expressing yourself, and building healthy relationships.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask for help or support when you need it. You may be out on your own, but your family and friends will still be there for you.

4. Work-Life Success

You’ve landed your new job, and with it comes big goals—maybe climbing the corporate ladder, chasing promotions, or expanding your expertise. But remember to still make time for life outside of work. It shouldn’t be a cycle of work, sleep, work, and squeezing in meals when you can. Now that you’re independent and free from homework deadlines, there’s still so much life to live! You just have to achieve a healthy balance:

  • Learn how to effectively manage your time by finding a routine that works for you. Use planners and calendars, and prioritize your tasks into categories like work, social life, and personal.
  • Set clear boundaries between work hours and personal time. Work will be there in the morning—you don’t need to answer emails at 9 p.m.
  • Schedule time to recharge so that you avoid burnout. It’s okay to take breaks and disconnect so you can give your best to your job and yourself.
  • Set goals for yourself! Whether it involves tracking them in a spreadsheet or making a perfectly curated Pinterest board, being able to visualize your goals will keep you going after the life you want to live.

Handling Difficult Situations as an Adult

There may come a time when a difficult situation arises and you have to confront it. You might lose a job, face financial challenges, hit a rough patch with friends, or feel the weight of loneliness. During these moments, it’s important to have some tricks up your sleeve to help you overcome them:

  • Pause and Breathe: Life doesn’t always go according to plan, and when that happens, give yourself permission to take a step back. Talk to someone you trust, practice breathwork, or go on a walk to clear your mind.
  • Make a Pros and Cons List: Maybe you’re stuck on a decision like which job to take or which city to move to. These decisions can weigh on you, so try writing a pros and cons list. This can often help you organize your thoughts and maybe even see the situation from a new angle.
  • Reflect on Long-Term Goals: They say a setback is just a setup for the ultimate comeback—don’t let an obstacle stand in your way of reaching your end goals. Reconnect with your long-term goals and find a way to adjust to get back on track.

Adulting isn’t a destination—it’s a journey you’ll be on for the rest of your life. It won’t always be easy, and you’ll have to make changes and big decisions along the way, but there’s also a lot of beauty that comes along with it. Remember, just because you are independent doesn’t mean you can’t ask for help. Your family and friends will still be around to support you. Don’t be too hard on yourself—in case no one told you, you’re doing great!

Becoming an adult means making the best decisions for yourself, and you can start by researching and finding a career that will suit you for years to come! Not sure what that career might be? Use College Raptor’s Career Finder to explore different jobs and their associated career projections and salaries.

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